The fairy tale by May Zheng (2011-07-24 08:52:56)

Hi. I'm hansel and Gretal's mom.  Now I know what you're thinking,how could you be so evil to your own children, blah, blah, blah, and all the rest of it.  Actually, my chidlren were pretty foolish and brainless, if you asked me.  They wasted their time helping people and other useless stuff. That's why I wanted to get rid of them.  Horrible brats, my children. Didn't know what was most important.  I wonder how I, I could actually have children like them.  We are just sooo different. So here is the real story.

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One day my mom, who always rushed, even thought there is no need to rush, told me that i needed to get married.  I was 18 at the time, and I did not approve or like my rushy mom's idea.  But she kept on pestering me, even when I refused.  Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. "FINE." I screamed, "I'LL MARRY A SILLY MAN AND HAVE SOME CUKOO KIDS AND LIVE UNHAPPILY EVER AFTER! WILL YOU BE HAPPY THEN?!"  I screamed.  my mom clapped her hands in delight. "OH, dear, I would love that! Please start asking men to marry you now! Oh, I'm just sohappy thinking about it! Ooooooh..." her voice trailed off.  And the next thing I knew, my mom had fainted, head in my hands.  i lugged her over to my bed and placed her on it.  I sighed.  How could I have such an annoying mom? I wonder how we are related.  And that is how I wound up with that kind-hearted crazy man for a husband.

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So we were very poor and we had children.  Do you know there names? Of course you do.  Their names were Hansel and Gretal.  Oh, how I hated those terrible brutes the first time I laid eyes on them! Grew up to be the most sillies kids I ever encounted in my life.  However, many other people, inlcuding my silly husband, admired and loved Hansel and Gretel.  I just don't understand how it's possible.  Then my grandma came to the rescue.  My grandma, you see, is the witch in the story.  So one night she came to my bedside and told me, "If you can't stand your children, my advice is to lead them away from home, where they can't find their way back home," she explained.  I nodded.  So I set her plan to work the next evening.  At that time, all that was left for food was a single loaf of bread.  So I told my husband, "We only have on loaf of bread.  Our home is becoming more and more wrecked every day.  Let's send our children deep into the forest." My husband looked startled, but I couldn't leave him alone until he agreed.  I checked on my insane children.  Still asleep.  Good.  I crept silently back to my bed and checked the time: 2:35am.  I yawned. And as soon as my head hit mat pillow, I was sound asleep,

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I woke up to the sound of laughter in the morning.  I checked the time: 7:05am.  I groaned.  Wouldn't my husband just tell my noisy children to be quiet?" I peeled myself off of my bed and changed and followed the noise.  It was coming from the kitchen.  When I saw what was going on, I think I fainted.  When I came to, I was to, I was sprawled on the floor.  i sighed, I had fallen with a deafening THUD and nobody had noticed a thing?!  Oops, I forgot to tell you what was happening in the kitchen.  Well, this is what's happening: Hansel and Gretal were playing a thing that's called....'Dumb guy and smart guy.' Gretal was the dumb one, and hansel was the smart guy.  Hansel was saying how to be dumb and Gretel kept doing what hansel said was dumb.  And they were turning the kitchen into a mess!! And the laughter was coming from... my husband's mouth.  i shook my head and sighed.  How could i have married such a man?! I stepped into the ktichen sakily and screamed, "STOP IT!!!" Hansel, Gretal, and my husband froze.  The pan Gretal was holding clattered to the floor.  finally, my husband broke the silence, "Er, Good morning, Emma." (Emma was my first name).  I barred my teeth.  Then I turned to hansel and Gretal.  "Clean up this mess or else," I murmured through gritted teeth.  Then i turned back to my husband, who's name was Henry Gongles, and said, "Henry Gongles, why didn't you think about me and let those horrid brats do whatever they want?!" I shook with rage.  Then, I think I fainted again.  When I came to, I was lying on my bed with 3 pairs of wide eyes staring back at me.  Could you guess who they belonged to? Yep, it was Hansel, Gretal, and my husband. "We were worried about you, Mommy," Gretal told me in a small voice.  "Yeah, "Hansel added, "We really were!" My husband smiled at my kids, and they smiled back.  Then he turned back to me, "Your children really did worry about you, Emma," he told me, I looked away in disgust.  When i looked back, hansel, Gretal, and my husband, were gone.  i got up and peeked into the kitchen.  it was just as messy as before.  i got so disgusted that steam started pouring out my ears. "Hansel! Gretal! come here now!" I bellowed.  My children came bounding to me. "Yes?" Gretal answered, "What would you like?" "I told you to clean up the kitchen, why didn't you do it?" Are you deaf?" Gretal looked at Hansel nervously.  Hanel shoved Gretal softly and gestured at me.  Then there was a moment of absolute silence.  Then, suddenly, Hansel and Gretal started we maniacs.  In a blink and a wink, the kitchen was so spotless.  i stared in wonder.  My jaw hung in the air.  finally, I found my voice. "H-how did y-y-you do that?" I gasped, still in shcok, hansel slapped a high five and grinned.  Then they turned to me, still grinning.  Then, together, they answer, "MAGIC."

After discovering that my children had this unique power, I decided not to send my children away.  I learned to love them and care for them, even though they still wake me up early, and now I have to deal with my husband...

The End