钢琴课小风波 (2014-02-01 04:44:24)

周三下午是钢琴课。为了配合老师的时间，我让孩子自己走去老师家，5分钟的路程。天气好的时候，我接她也是步行。

但是那天依旧天寒地冻，我让孩子在家等我，送她过去。应该是45分钟的课，所以在半个小时后，我看到来电显示是钢琴老师家的电话号码，心里一慌。当时正在手忙脚乱地对付JUICER，老师在电话里说，MAY的情绪很不好，请我过去把她接走。

我很纳闷，但是还是迅速地去了老师家。老师告诉我她哭了，并且没有办法安抚下来，今天的课就不上了，明天再上，并叮嘱我回去问她怎么了，担心是她的话或者举动惹到了她。
我带她回了家，没有立刻问她怎么了，让她洗手准备吃饭。

吃完饭，我问她是不是能跟我讲讲？她说她觉得事情太多了，而且今天的作业里要用Google Chrome，她不知道自己是不是把我的电脑mess up了，如果里面有那么多的数据，她担心会不会有数据丢失等等。因为周二去了数学奥林匹克小组赛，没有去ART CREW，今天看到ART CREW画好的POSTER，她觉得自己有点被LEFT OUT等等。她哗啦啦地说了一番。我仔细地听着，告诉她两点，一生活是TRADE OFF，二熟悉一个新的东西/应用程序都需要一个过程，慢慢就会好的。我告诉她在她的IPAD上也可以用GOOGLE DRIVE。
晚上我给钢琴老师写了一封EMAIL：
Hi Ms. Yu,

May said she just felt stressed out -  because of the homework (today they are learning how to use Google Chrome as a communication tool to get the homework and submit the homework, which is brand new for her).  And she is also frustrated with herself - she does not feel that she practiced well enough.
The other reason I guess is that she is now at the stage of "tween" and she is going through a period of rapid social and emotional development. She will have her ups and downs and does not know how to handle the pressure properly yet, thus the only way she can do right now is to cry.  Being resilient is really essential, for kids and for adults as well.
Sorry for the inconvenience for you.  I've talked to her, and hopefully, she can learn to control her feelings little by little.  Being a qualified parent is hard.  The scary part is that we can never "Do it again."
Really sorry about that.  We will see you tomorrow.
Night,

Sunny
第二天早晨我查信箱的时候，钢琴老师已经给我回了信：

No problem at all.
I was worried I I'd something wrong. I was going to write you tomorrow...
Because when I tried to calm her down and patted on her back, she was quite angry and told me don't touch her. So I thought I said something to make her very upset.

I know it is hard. We are growing with them every day as well.
Tell her to take it easy, it will be hard to make everything perfect and go the way we want in life. I learned it the hard way. Sometimes I made both myself and others very upset. Now as long as I have tried my best, I will take whatever comes. Now I am much happier not to be a perfectionist.

I am sure she will find her balance soon. As parents, we can just let her grow and learn and wait patiently. I think you guys are doing great already. May is such a wonderful child!
Don't worry, I do not mind at all. I wish I could help but I guess I failed.
See you tomorrow.
Eva

周四我再送她去上钢琴课，提醒她。她点点头。接下来的那堂课就比较愉快了。
我还给她写了一封信。重点在于告诉她她随时都可以来找我，如果她想来找我的话。还告诉她做一个有弹性的人是多么的重要。妈妈我也做得不好，以后我们相互提醒。